I often wonder why you did what you did. I guess I'll never really know will I? The burden of suicide is rarely left on those who commit the act, and rather on those left to grieve.
On one hand, I'll always miss you. You were my best friend after all. You were there for me, through some of the darkest patches of my life, and I thought I was there for you, but I guess you kept a mask on it. On the other hand, I find myself resenting you at times. Not because of what you did, but because of what you couldn't do. You decided to leave my life, your family's life, you decided to leave everything and everyone, and I'll never really understand why. I think that's really the hard part; not knowing. Why is it that you could finally find peace, but the rest of us are left with this hole in our hearts where you used to be?
I deeply miss you, every day. There was so much to look forward to in our lives. You had your whole life ahead of you; graduation, relationships, you name it, you could've had it. Now I'm forced to go on without my best friend. There are days when all I want to do are laugh about what's going on, there are days I need your advice, there are days when I just need you, yet you're gone.
I know there's nothing I could've done to prevent you doing what you did. You were too smart to let that happen. I just wish you would've let me in, so that I could've tried to help. I miss you.
Written by gleaming-ostrich-497
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